Taming the Shrewd Muse (Guest Spot)

WANTED: Renegade Muse. Dead or Alive.
-by Nev Scheffler

My Muse is a lazy, fickle b*tch. Quite truthfully, she wouldn't care if I were flipping burgers at MickeyDees. Instead of images of coy, graceful and inspirational Greek beauties that are invoked at the mention of "Muse," I'm almost certain I have a moody, seventeen-year-old with bad gum-chewing and channel-flipping habits. What's more is I think she idolizes Bonnie Parker or Belle Starr because she's always shooting down good freelance leads and always—and I mean ALWAYS—on the run.

Long and short of it: I can't wait for her to inspire me. I've heard "writers" who aren't writing full-time for the bread and bacon wax poetic about waiting for their "Muse to strike." If I wait for that, I'm afraid I'm going to be a mangled literary mess in the middle of the freelance highway. My Muse takes no prisoners.

So, when it's time to write, I don't wait for the little tart to show up. I hunt her down like the dog she is. I drag her by her hair, kicking and screaming into my mind and tie her to something sturdy. And I squeeze the inspiration out of her. She may emerge bloodied, bruised and spiritually broken, but SHE. WILL. TALK!

Want to catch your Muse and make her give you the goods? Then you can't be gentle. You can't pussyfoot around when it's your writing career that's been held hostage in some dingy basement. Torture may be illegal for the U.S. Government, but it doesn't apply to mythical creatures—including Muses.

So, go ahead, try a little mental waterboarding to get the writing goods:

1. Capture & Detain:The only way to stop your Muse from watching T.V., idly hanging out at the bookstore, baking a cake, or surfing in the Web is to physically put her in a chair, in front of the computer and open up a word processing document. If need be, give yourself a timeframe in which to finish any online research, then unplug the 'net.

2. Bribery Helps:Sometimes honey attracts more Muses than vinegar. So promise her the world. Wave a piece of nice dark chocolate in front of her nose. Remind her that if she helps you complete that assignment, you'll buy her a nice steak dinner. Muses like to eat too.

3. Threaten Her:Does your Muse like having pretty face? What about her mythical powers? OR a weekend off to watch that new movie she's been dying to see? Hit her where it hurts. Take away something she likes if she doesn't get the work done. If she is going to act like a spoiled teenager, then ground her. If that doesn't work, go on and maim her a bit, maybe even strap a bomb to her with short fuse. A few scars and bruises will just remind her to get motivated the next time she wants to slack off. And it's amazing how much she'll get done if she knows she's on a timer.

4. Force Her Hand:Still not talking? Give her a shot of tongue-loosening serum in the form of a blank page and a generic prompt. Refuse to let her stop talking for 5, 10, 20, 30 minutes. She can't get up, move, play online, stop writing, get a drink, or anything but ramble until the timer goes off. Then when it does, you can glean through the chaff for some grains of wisdom.

And finally.... 5. PRAISE:Your Muse has spoken. It took some extreme measures, but she finally broke down and spilled the beans. She's given you a good paragraph or two. Show her that you appreciate her cooperation with something nice and a pat on her pretty little (though slightly battered) head. Then remind her that life will be a whole lot easier if she only cooperates.


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According to Nev's Twitter profile, she is a Gemini with too many hobbies. A writer for hire.

http://www.nevadascheffler.com/
http://www.linkedin.com/in/nevadascheffler
http://stores.lulu.com/nevadascheffler

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Want to be the next author featured in the Guest Spot? Then submit your creative or commentary piece to aliciacreative@gmail.com. Use the subject line "Written Proof Submission" when you email. I look forward to sharing your words with the world!

An Exercise in Creativity (Part 1)

Whether you need to unlock or unblock your creativity, don’t fret. Sometimes staring at a blank page is the hardest part. Artists must feel the same when they stare at a blank canvas. Getting started is what matters. And there are many exerices to excite your muse.

Rule 1: Don’t even consider using backspace or delete. You're not here to edit. You're here to write whatever comes to mind, no matter if your pesky brain is telling you to stop, erase or give up. Remember, this should be free flowing thought.

Rule 2: Use adjectives. Lots of them.

Rule 3: Write in first or third person. You decide which you feel more comfortable with.

Rule 4: Turn on any kind of music you want. Notice the impact music will have on your writing.

Rule 5: Make up your own rules. Just insist that don't give up, no matter if your muse suffers from acute shyness.

Before you begin, close your eyes, take a few deep breaths and picture something – somewhere you’ve been or never seen – and take a good, hard look around. Notice the landscape, the skyline, the colors. Take notice of the sounds, the textiles, the smells. Take ten more deep breaths so you can fully engage in this world – real or imagined.

Then, open up your eyes and write what you experienced. Let the music help unlock or unblock your free flow. Immerse yourself in describing everything you saw when your eyes were shut. Maybe it’s 5 sentences or 50. It doesn’t matter.

Once you feel like you’ve written it all down – or are willing to stop after 20 minutes – go back through and mark each descriptive word or phrase that applies to your senses: sight, sound, touch, smell, taste.

Ask yourself a few questions:
Did I use more than one sense?
Was one sense more dominant throughout?
What sense was easier to recognize and describe?
Which one would I like to capture better?
Out of the 5 senses, which one do I think captures the true experience of what I’ve written?

Then, if you want to further explore this exercise, re-write the piece using only one of the senses – the dominant one or the one that truly captures the experience. Call upon metaphors, similies and other literary devices to describe this world that exists. After all, your imagination is powerful. Exercise it often. And don’t be afraid to be inspired by yourself, your thoughts, your feelings or your own experiences – real or imagined.

Lastly, if you feel inclined, share your finished piece. You won't be critiqued or graded. This isn't a college course and the exericse isn't mandatory. But, you will have the opportunity to invite others into the world you created. And isn't that what creative writing is meant to do - touch, affect, inspire and change others?

Obama Wins Marketer of the Year

Try marketing yourself and your policies – to a nation. Swimming with sharks sounds less like a challenge. Some of the best and most effective marketing campaigns are simple, consistent and relevant. Obama’s team leaned on these fundamentals.

What Marketers Can Learn From Obama's Campaign (click for article)

What do you think?

Here are a couple comments from astute Marketers who are in agreement that Obama pulled off an amazingly strategic and effective campaign:

• Regardless of your voting direction, his marketing was extremely compelling. "Change" "Yes you can" "Unity" all very powerful symbols. And his team has already laid the groundwork for moving from campaign one, "take action for change by voting for Obama," to campaign two, "take action to achieve change together." Subtle but very strategic in maintaining a brand connection and reliance on his audience.


• What I thought was most genius was how he branded himself and his campaign for office. He had his own logo, without any words, and you soon knew who it stood for and WHAT it stood for. Also, it was pure genius how he ran/executed his campaign – from text messages (I got one this morning even), involvement on Twitter and other social media sites, and visits to strategic locations (e.g. Espanola, New Mexico).

So, it’s not always what you say; it’s how you say it. It’s not always what you do; it’s how you do it.

I could go on and on about Obama’s campaign and how his staff revolutionized how one runs for the Oval Office. Just look at the photos from Grant Park last night. Talk about thousands upon thousands of people having clearly heard Obama’s message. Loud, clear and with hope. “Yes, we can.”

Also, something I heard on NPR the night before Election Day gave me chills. (Beautiful, moving writing is one thing; a great delivery is what feels like a much-appreciated kick to the gut.)

“Rosa Parks sat so Martin King Jr. could walk.

Martin King Jr. walked so Obama could run.

Obama is running so we all can fly.”

Talk about a powerful soundbite!

And for some political fun, check this out: http://labs.google.com/inquotes/ (Google, you’re awesome.)